Soulspedia 1.4

Soulspedia 1.4

Well those of you that don’t know me that well - might be surprised by this story. It’s a story that is often not told – because it congers up feelings of embarrassment in many of its victims – or those effected by its victims; the events that sometimes happen in house holds that we make sure the neighbors and family members might get peep shows at but never confront face to face; an ugly contradiction in the closet of our society that many people deal with in solemn silence; this cancerous limb is not a secrete but it is kept as one, like a horse hiding behind a pole; it is hopelessly concealed yet blatantly obvious.
Despite its many names only one name is truly fitting – Soulspedia. It is easy for our bodies too take vacations – these excursions are simply a number of miles away – but not so easy is it to escape our selves. We are hopelessly confined to our bodies – with hope of escape – seemingly only in death. Soulspedia is the word that I use to describe the process which we go through to escape ourselves – instead of Expedia which takes our bodies away – I want to talk about the things that we use to take our minds and souls on lavish vacations.
The ticket is pricey. It comes in the forms of many names coffee, alcohol, antidepressants, hash, pain, attention, weed, cocaine, heroin, acid, ecstasy, movies, love, shopping, video games, popularity, sex, entertainment, food and all the other words in the dictionary. The range and intensity of its use differs on the bases of the person but they find similarity in the promise that they facilitate escape of the mind and soul from the confines of self. The unyielding desire of the human being to float away from itself – to fix the unfixable – and remedy the Closter phobia of confinement.
The promise of that drink, that smoke, that drug or that companion, which propel human beings to choose the tool of their escape. Many might be concerned about the danger of the things we run too but it can be far more revealing to depict the isolation we run from. In social settings we quickly plummet into our escape pods – tiny glasses filled with magical elixirs – hiding our insecurities from ourselves for a nominal price. Music fills our ears at a level that makes conversation undesirable. Conversation is repulsive because it reminds us of ourselves and in these moments we wish to be recreated. Soulspedia creates that escape so that we no longer have to stay confined – during interviews with stars we do not watch them – we become them. We do not admire them but rather our new self – embodied in the smart, beautiful and funny people – we were never recognized for being. What we run from is the blatant obviousness of our imperfection.
I have been the first hand witness to the progression of a person from using a substance to forget who they are – to falling in love with their escape so much so - that they had no propensity to realize what they were running from. It no longer mattered and the result was a person that had not the ability to look at them selves in a state of sobriety longer then it took to get himself to the liquor store – and to throw it down the hatch. Like the coach of the loosing team that had infinite time outs – to postpone that defeat – they were too scared to face – not seeming to know that - next Sunday would be another game to win – that they could start over.